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Kind: captions
Language: en

1
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This is the Technical Difficulties,
we're playing Citation Needed.

2
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Joining me today, he reads books y'know,
it's Chris Joel.

3
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More of a value pack with each passing year.

4
00:00:11.920 --> 00:00:13.680
Everybody's favourite Gary Brannan,
Gary Brannan.

5
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♪ I kissed a gull, and I liked it ♪

6
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Did you just say gull?

7
00:00:19.600 --> 00:00:21.800
Yes, that was the joke.

8
00:00:21.800 --> 00:00:23.840
-Okay, just... just clarifying that.
-Enunciate, then!

9
00:00:24.520 --> 00:00:26.560
And the bounciest man on the internet,
Matt Gray.

10
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♪ I... didn’t come up with anything
to say here. ♪

11
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In front of me I've got an article from
Wikipedia and these folks can't see it.

12
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Every fact they get right is a point
and a ding.

13
00:00:38.800 --> 00:00:40.400
And there's a special prize for
particularly good answers which is...

14
00:00:43.300 --> 00:00:45.700
-That was pretty good.
-Yeah.

15
00:00:45.700 --> 00:00:49.360
And today we are talking about
the Norwegian butter crisis.

16
00:00:49.360 --> 00:00:50.600
Awrgh!

17
00:00:50.600 --> 00:00:54.240
Of all the crises, up there with Cuban missile,
I always find.

18
00:00:54.240 --> 00:00:57.320
I can't believe that it's not a margarine crisis.

19
00:00:57.320 --> 00:00:59.680
Well, that actually clarifies what I was going
to ask which is...

20
00:00:59.680 --> 00:01:01.680
-Clarifies!
-Clarifies!

21
00:01:03.640 --> 00:01:06.440
I'd like to say it was on purpose - no.

22
00:01:06.440 --> 00:01:07.560
Just slid into that one.

23
00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:10.640
The Norwegian butter crisis.

24
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Was it a crisis involving butter?

25
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In Norway.

26
00:01:14.800 --> 00:01:18.600
You can both technically have a point for that,
but I'd like a bit more.

27
00:01:18.600 --> 00:01:21.120
Is that a bit like an essay question where
you're just repeating the title

28
00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:23.120
basically to get you out of deep water?

29
00:01:23.120 --> 00:01:25.440
Now the question I have to try and think of the
answer of is,

30
00:01:25.440 --> 00:01:27.200
did they have too much or too little?

31
00:01:28.040 --> 00:01:30.320
-Because...
-"Aargh! There's so much butter!"

32
00:01:30.320 --> 00:01:32.400
-I'm going for too much butter.
-Butterlanche!

33
00:01:32.400 --> 00:01:34.280
-Butterlanche?
-Butterlanche.

34
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The question was too much or too little?

35
00:01:36.520 --> 00:01:38.000
-Well, too much.
-Too little.

36
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Exactly the right amount,
which freaked everybody out.

37
00:01:41.560 --> 00:01:42.560
Gary gets the point.

38
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Too little butter.

39
00:01:43.760 --> 00:01:46.960
So if there's a butter crisis does that mean
there's a milk crisis going on as well?

40
00:01:46.960 --> 00:01:48.720
-Oh!
-Ooh. Yes.

41
00:01:48.720 --> 00:01:50.160
Because doesn't butter come from milk?

42
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Yes, it does.

43
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Yay!

44
00:01:51.320 --> 00:01:52.920
Yay!
Do I get a point for that?

45
00:01:52.920 --> 00:01:55.840
Yeah. You don't get a point
for butter coming from milk,

46
00:01:55.840 --> 00:01:57.320
but you do get the point for…

47
00:01:57.320 --> 00:02:01.960
But, yes, heavy rains during the summer affected
the grazing of cows and reduced milk production.

48
00:02:02.320 --> 00:02:05.240
So what happens
if there is a shortage of butter?

49
00:02:05.240 --> 00:02:07.160
You buy butter from somewhere else.

50
00:02:07.160 --> 00:02:10.160
Toast is awful,
it's just dry with a topping.

51
00:02:10.160 --> 00:02:13.560
We're talking basic supply and demand here,
there is less butter therefore…

52
00:02:13.560 --> 00:02:16.880
Butter is more costly and only available
to the crown heads of Europe.

53
00:02:16.880 --> 00:02:19.920
I'm... I'm giving you a point
for the first half of that answer.

54
00:02:20.240 --> 00:02:23.520
Norway was gripped by smørpanikk
which translates as...?

55
00:02:23.520 --> 00:02:24.640
Some more panic.

56
00:02:25.600 --> 00:02:26.720
Some more...

57
00:02:27.600 --> 00:02:28.880
-Butter panic.
-Yes.

58
00:02:28.880 --> 00:02:31.020
I can think of like a Norwegian panic scale

59
00:02:31.020 --> 00:02:33.600
which is "nor-panic, smør-panik,
lots of panic".

60
00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:39.120
So, yes, it got to the point where
a single pack of imported Lurpak butter…

61
00:02:39.120 --> 00:02:40.800
Oh, Lurpak, oh...

62
00:02:40.800 --> 00:02:43.680
Cost, oh, you know what,
we get to do Price is Right rules here.

63
00:02:43.680 --> 00:02:46.400
Here is a pack of butter.

64
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-A pack this big?
-Import...

65
00:02:48.200 --> 00:02:50.520
-Here is a pack of butter.
-Here is a pack of butter.

66
00:02:50.760 --> 00:02:52.920
Mid-December 2011,

67
00:02:52.920 --> 00:02:54.760
-so this is recent.
-Salted or unsalted?

68
00:02:54.760 --> 00:02:57.000
-It does not specify.
-Because it does depend on the use,

69
00:02:57.000 --> 00:02:59.960
because if it's unsalted that's more your bakers
who are going to be throwing money at it.

70
00:02:59.960 --> 00:03:03.320
Oh, no, this is...
this is very much dietary butter.

71
00:03:03.480 --> 00:03:04.680
-Dietary...
-Dietary butter?

72
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Dietary butter, there's a butter diet now?

73
00:03:07.200 --> 00:03:08.480
I quote.

74
00:03:09.960 --> 00:03:12.520
Slice it like cheese and put it on toast.

75
00:03:12.520 --> 00:03:14.240
-Place your bids?
-1,000 krone.

76
00:03:14.240 --> 00:03:16.040
-1,000 krone.
-Oh, s***, we're doing it in krone?

77
00:03:16.040 --> 00:03:18.080
No, we're not doing it in krone,
I don't have a calculator here.

78
00:03:18.080 --> 00:03:19.360
I'm doing it in krone.

79
00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:21.240
1,000 krone is about 100 quid, I think.

80
00:03:21.240 --> 00:03:23.040
Yeah, that's more or less 100 quid, so…

81
00:03:23.040 --> 00:03:24.560
1,000 krone!

82
00:03:24.560 --> 00:03:26.560
I'm going to say the equivalent of 25 quid.

83
00:03:26.560 --> 00:03:31.360
I was going to say 100 quid, but he's already
got that, so let's say £150 or 1,500 krone.

84
00:03:31.360 --> 00:03:35.160
Gary is correct,
£32 for a small pack of butter.

85
00:03:35.160 --> 00:03:37.000
Hang on, 32 quid for a pack of butter?

86
00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:40.000
Yeah. It's about the same as you pay
in Saino's now for Lurpak.

87
00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.600
So why did this not get resolved by...
by the free hand of capitalism?

88
00:03:46.600 --> 00:03:48.680
Because the free hand of capitalism
had too much butter on it,

89
00:03:48.680 --> 00:03:50.160
it was all slippy and couldn't grip it.

90
00:03:54.520 --> 00:03:56.920
They could pass the butter but they couldn't
pick up the corners.

91
00:03:57.440 --> 00:03:59.440
Just sliding out of their hands.

92
00:03:59.440 --> 00:04:01.160
I think the butterfingers of capitalism

93
00:04:01.160 --> 00:04:04.160
has just summed up everything
that's wrong with the world, Gary.

94
00:04:04.160 --> 00:04:06.120
I'm giving, yeah, you know what...

95
00:04:06.120 --> 00:04:07.400
Mystery Biscuits.

126
00:04:07.400 --> 00:04:08.560
Hey!

97
00:04:08.560 --> 00:04:09.940
Actual satire.

98
00:04:09.940 --> 00:04:12.640
Why did they not just import more butter?

99
00:04:12.640 --> 00:04:14.520
-Tariffs.
-Yes.

100
00:04:14.520 --> 00:04:16.380
'Cos… 'cos not in EU.

101
00:04:16.380 --> 00:04:18.160
-Yes.
-Topical.

102
00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:20.720
Hold on everybody, Radio 4, Radio 4, get the...

103
00:04:20.720 --> 00:04:22.880
get the big reel to reel recorders running,
we're coming.

104
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Yes, tariffs on butter, there was a deficit of
500 to 1,000 tons of butter in the country.

105
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Just one shipping container.

106
00:04:31.280 --> 00:04:33.180
That they can see over the border in...

107
00:04:33.180 --> 00:00:43.300
...Sweden? Norway?

108
00:00:43.300 --> 00:04:37.440
-Yeah.
-Yeah.

109
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That is a land border.

224
00:04:39.320 --> 00:04:40.520
Yes.

111
00:04:40.520 --> 00:04:42.080
(Thank you.)

112
00:04:42.080 --> 00:04:44.560
I'm all a bit hazy around that region,
I don't know who's next to what.

113
00:04:44.560 --> 00:04:48.160
Surely that affected Sweden as well because the
weather should be similar around there, right?

114
00:04:48.160 --> 00:04:51.080
You say that, what did some Swedes do?

115
00:04:51.080 --> 00:04:54.880
Did they taunt them on the border
by eating really thickly buttered toast?

116
00:04:54.880 --> 00:04:56.720
-I'd do that.
-I would actually, yeah.

117
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To Lancashire!

118
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Post butter over the border?

119
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-Try and make...
-Smuggle, butter smugglers!

224
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Yes.

121
00:05:06.240 --> 00:05:08.000
What's in the van?
"Nøt bütter."

122
00:05:09.680 --> 00:05:11.960
A number of individuals were apprehended by
the authorities

123
00:05:11.960 --> 00:05:14.860
for attempting to smuggle butter
across the border,

124
00:05:14.860 --> 00:05:19.960
whilst Swedes posted online adverts
offering to drive butter to Norwegians.

125
00:05:19.960 --> 00:04:07.400
Did they get around the customs
by greasing their palms?

126
00:04:07.400 --> 00:04:08.560
Hey!

127
00:05:24.680 --> 00:05:25.600
No.

128
00:05:26.960 --> 00:05:29.920
A Danish television show also broadcast something.

129
00:05:29.920 --> 00:05:30.920
Television.

130
00:05:32.240 --> 00:05:34.360
I need to learn to be more specific
with my questions.

131
00:05:34.360 --> 00:05:37.560
Did they just have some slow TV, Norway style,

132
00:05:37.560 --> 00:05:41.080
but of just butter
melting in a kitchen somewhere?

133
00:05:41.080 --> 00:05:43.800
Someone's just watching going,
"What a waste."

134
00:05:44.160 --> 00:05:47.760
Sad chefs with empty pans go looking
with big puppy dog eyes.

135
00:05:47.760 --> 00:05:49.320
And going, "If only I had some butter."

136
00:05:49.320 --> 00:05:54.040
Do you know what, yes, they broadcast
a satirical emergency appeal to send butter.

137
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This isn't a joke,
there are people without butter in this country.

138
00:05:56.960 --> 00:06:00.800
They gathered 4,000 packs to be distributed
to butter starved Norwegians.

139
00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:01.760
-Bloody hell.
-Really.

140
00:06:01.760 --> 00:06:05.880
There's a lot of very dark stuff in here,
but there is also the Ark of Taste.

141
00:06:06.200 --> 00:06:07.240
What?

142
00:06:07.240 --> 00:06:09.800
Is that like the Ark of the Covenant but with…
with tasty treats?

143
00:06:09.800 --> 00:06:12.560
"Don't look at it!
It's full of...!"

144
00:06:13.000 --> 00:06:16.320
The butter just comes flying out, fried foods.

145
00:06:16.320 --> 00:06:19.240
"I'm melting!"
But it's butter, it's all just butter.

146
00:06:19.240 --> 00:06:25.560
Is it an institution kind of thing that is a...
a catalogue of national tastes?

147
00:06:25.560 --> 00:06:29.200
So would it have the
fermented fishy canny thing in it?

148
00:06:29.200 --> 00:06:31.600
Almost, there's one word you're missing
in there,

149
00:06:32.600 --> 00:06:36.480
which is, yes, it's a catalogue of international
foodstuffs and tastes and things like that.

150
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Extinct.

151
00:06:38.640 --> 00:06:39.760
Nearly.

152
00:06:39.760 --> 00:06:43.800
You're not longer culturally dying out like
Welsh died out, that sort of thing...

153
00:06:43.800 --> 00:06:46.040
That'll do, endangered heritage foods.

154
00:06:46.040 --> 00:06:48.600
So is it all stuff that people either
can't be arsed to make any more,

155
00:06:48.600 --> 00:06:51.160
they've decided it's not good for you
and it's gone out of fashion kind of stuff

156
00:06:51.160 --> 00:06:52.400
and then everyone's forgotten about it?

157
00:06:52.400 --> 00:06:55.040
Yeah, pretty much, it may not be
forgotten about, but it could be.

158
00:06:55.040 --> 00:06:59.120
Or rules have presented it being done
like unpasteurised milk, that kind of thing.

159
00:06:59.120 --> 00:07:02.920
Does anyone want to name some of the things that
are in the United Kingdom section of the articles,

160
00:07:02.920 --> 00:07:06.680
just in terms of categories, if not exact things,
what are we famous for historically?

161
00:07:06.680 --> 00:07:08.000
Cornish pasties?

162
00:07:08.000 --> 00:07:09.320
No, they're fine, aren't they?

163
00:07:09.320 --> 00:07:11.440
There's loads of those,
there was one on York Station this morning.

164
00:07:12.040 --> 00:07:15.880
Just lying there abandoned,
sad music playing over the top of it.

165
00:07:15.880 --> 00:07:17.320
Some kind of cheese?

166
00:07:17.320 --> 00:07:22.220
Yeah, it's mostly cheeses and grains, that’s…
that's the history of Britain right there.

167
00:07:22.220 --> 00:07:24.560
What a great duo they were: cheese and grains.

168
00:07:24.560 --> 00:07:25.880
-And potatoes.
-Potatoes, really?

169
00:07:25.880 --> 00:07:29.160
-Potatoes.
-Any specific famous potatoes you might know?

170
00:07:29.160 --> 00:07:30.760
King Edward?

171
00:07:30.760 --> 00:07:31.920
Maris Piper?

172
00:07:31.920 --> 00:07:33.480
You're just naming potatoes now.

173
00:07:33.480 --> 00:07:35.040
That's what you asked us to do.

174
00:07:35.040 --> 00:07:37.040
-What we're looking for here…
-What, an individually famous potato?

175
00:07:37.040 --> 00:07:39.240
What we're looking for here
is the pointless answer.

176
00:07:39.240 --> 00:07:43.120
The Koh-i-Noor potato that sat
in the royal crown up until 1640,

177
00:07:43.120 --> 00:07:47.600
until the English Civil War the middle of the
English crown had a f***ing spud in it.

178
00:07:49.400 --> 00:07:50.720
Jersey Royal, apparently...

179
00:07:50.720 --> 00:07:52.000
How are they endangered?

180
00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:54.760
It is listed here as being this…
this endangered thing.

181
00:07:54.760 --> 00:07:56.200
I smell bulls***.

182
00:07:56.760 --> 00:07:57.640
Not in there.

183
00:07:57.640 --> 00:08:00.560
Not in there, not in there sadly,
there is old Gloucester beef.

184
00:08:01.560 --> 00:08:04.320
Old Gloucester beef is just an argument
in old Gloucester.

185
00:08:06.840 --> 00:08:08.160
Well, you enjoyed it.

186
00:08:09.040 --> 00:08:12.440
Not to be confused with a double Gloucester beef
when there's only one piece of cheese left,

187
00:08:12.440 --> 00:08:14.680
And you can't decide who wants it.

188
00:08:14.680 --> 00:08:16.400
Come on Radio 4, come on, this is good.

189
00:08:17.760 --> 00:08:21.080
We also have under food politics,
the British Restaurant.

190
00:08:21.080 --> 00:08:22.280
That from World War…

191
00:08:22.280 --> 00:08:24.720
I saw, sorry, I saw your face go there.

192
00:08:24.720 --> 00:08:26.440
-Ding!
-That was the face of Gary going,

193
00:08:26.440 --> 00:08:28.240
"I have remembered an archive fact."

194
00:08:29.160 --> 00:08:31.480
Can I just say, readers, there's a...
one of my things I'd like to get out on this…

195
00:08:31.480 --> 00:08:33.280
-Did you just call them readers?
-Yes.

196
00:08:34.800 --> 00:08:36.120
They may be reading.

197
00:08:36.680 --> 00:08:38.880
They're that bored they've all got a book out.

198
00:08:39.400 --> 00:08:43.640
Not every fact comes from intelligent things,
this is from Dad's Army.

199
00:08:45.240 --> 00:08:47.840
The British Restaurant was a national
restaurant in the Second World War,

200
00:08:47.840 --> 00:08:51.600
that sold cheap and…
cheap and good food to people.

201
00:08:51.600 --> 00:08:52.720
-Yes,
-Not just soldiers.

202
00:08:52.720 --> 00:08:56.920
Absolutely right. It was a government...
it was originally a community feeding centre.

203
00:08:56.920 --> 00:08:59.240
-then Winston Churchill came along and…
-Why did they change the name?

204
00:08:59.240 --> 00:09:02.760
Yeah, Winston Churchill came along and decided
that British Restaurant was a better name.

205
00:09:02.760 --> 00:09:04.800
"The British Restaurant."

206
00:09:07.040 --> 00:09:13.280
"We're serving brandy
and you can have a large plate of brandy."

207
00:09:13.280 --> 00:09:14.640
"And some cheese."

208
00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:20.960
We also have the category here
in Wikipedia of butter.

209
00:09:21.680 --> 00:09:24.080
There is an entire article on Lurpak,

210
00:09:24.080 --> 00:09:29.320
there is also an entire article
on someone called Norma Lyon - L-Y-O-N.

211
00:09:30.120 --> 00:09:32.560
She's an American farmer and an artist.

212
00:09:32.560 --> 00:09:35.800
Who painted in butter or carved into butter.

213
00:09:35.800 --> 00:09:37.800
-Yes.
-Like the Lurpak advert,

214
00:09:37.800 --> 00:09:39.640
remember it, this was in the 90s.

215
00:09:40.920 --> 00:09:45.400
Yes, born in Nashville, Tennessee,
what kind of things did she carve out of butter?

216
00:09:45.400 --> 00:09:46.680
-President's faces.
-Busts.

217
00:09:46.680 --> 00:09:48.080
Cubes. Bricks.

218
00:09:51.800 --> 00:09:53.000
Cathedrals.

219
00:09:53.680 --> 00:09:55.840
They're made of bricks,
just made of bricks.

220
00:09:55.840 --> 00:09:59.960
Well, this was a specific thing at the
Iowa state fair, and has been every year.

221
00:09:59.960 --> 00:10:02.080
-Corn.
-It's... oh, it's very apt

222
00:10:02.080 --> 00:10:03.760
that you would carve
this out of butter, it's almost…

223
00:10:03.760 --> 00:04:39.320
-A cow.
-A cow.

224
00:04:39.320 --> 00:04:40.520
Yes.

225
00:10:06.920 --> 00:10:09.600
The Iowa state fair butter cow.

226
00:10:09.600 --> 00:10:11.440
That’s taking the piss a little bit, isn't it?

227
00:10:11.440 --> 00:10:13.160
Well, taking the milk, but you know.

228
00:10:13.760 --> 00:10:17.040
If you're taking the piss, something's
gone very wrong with your butter, mate.

229
00:10:17.040 --> 00:10:20.000
Do they carve a specific cow
or just the generic concept of cow?

230
00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:20.960
Eh?

231
00:10:20.960 --> 00:10:23.120
Oh, wow,
Plato's World of the Buttery Cave.

232
00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:25.840
Eh, how does that work?

233
00:10:25.840 --> 00:10:28.000
Did they carve a cow
or did they carve Daisy?

234
00:10:28.680 --> 00:10:32.960
Oh, right, so a specific cow or just like
an outline of, you know, cows. Yeah

235
00:10:32.960 --> 00:10:35.680
So Daisy can look at butter Daisy
made from Daisy's butter.

236
00:10:35.680 --> 00:10:37.720
No, it was a generic cow,

237
00:10:37.720 --> 00:10:42.320
but there were also some other topical things
that were carved alongside it.

238
00:10:42.320 --> 00:10:43.760
A milk urn or whatever it's called.

239
00:10:43.760 --> 00:10:47.160
No, topical for whatever was going on
in the world that year.

240
00:10:47.160 --> 00:10:48.200
A tank.

241
00:10:48.720 --> 00:10:50.680
-Well, it would have been World War 2.
-What was the year?

242
00:10:50.680 --> 00:10:54.960
Basically every... what I have for a list here
is everything since 1996.

243
00:10:55.120 --> 00:10:57.960
Every year since 1996
they've carved something out of butter?

244
00:10:57.960 --> 00:11:01.240
They've carved both a butter cow,
that's been since 1911

245
00:11:01.240 --> 00:11:03.440
and since '96 there's been something else there.

246
00:11:03.440 --> 00:11:04.680
-Tony Blair.
-Spice Girls.

247
00:11:06.080 --> 00:11:08.560
We’ve both hit 1996 there.

248
00:11:08.560 --> 00:11:11.240
You see, what was weird was what I didn't get
out in time was 'Mr Blobby',

249
00:11:11.240 --> 00:11:12.760
so I would've been about '96.

250
00:11:13.960 --> 00:11:16.960
I think we were in Britain in 1996, weren't we?

251
00:11:17.200 --> 00:11:20.320
No, some of the things include Tiger Woods,

252
00:11:20.320 --> 00:11:21.680
when he... when he won the golf.

253
00:11:21.680 --> 00:11:23.200
-Bill Clinton.
-A saxophone,

254
00:11:23.200 --> 00:11:25.160
something that's definitely just a cigar?

255
00:11:25.160 --> 00:11:27.760
-Yes.
-Ah. No, that... that year...

256
00:11:27.760 --> 00:11:29.080
What year was that?
Good grief.

257
00:11:29.080 --> 00:11:33.200
That would be about 99, no, 97,
it will have been around 96, 97.

258
00:11:33.200 --> 00:11:35.520
No, an American eagle was there that year.

259
00:11:35.520 --> 00:11:36.960
America.

260
00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:39.000
And in 2007, Harry Potter.

261
00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:40.040
-Of course.
-Wow!

262
00:11:40.040 --> 00:11:41.760
-Harry Butter.
-Hairy butter?

263
00:11:41.760 --> 00:11:44.080
-Hairy butter?
-Send it back to the cow.

264
00:11:44.080 --> 00:11:47.680
Alright, there was one last thing I want
to talk about in the category of butter.

265
00:11:47.680 --> 00:11:49.480
The great sentences of our time!

266
00:11:50.600 --> 00:11:52.680
This is the butter episode,
and I would like us to talk…

267
00:11:52.680 --> 00:11:54.400
The butter episode.

268
00:11:54.400 --> 00:11:56.720
About artificial butter flavouring.

269
00:11:56.720 --> 00:11:58.600
Eurgh, just don't.

270
00:11:58.600 --> 00:12:02.000
God, you sound like this chair
at an agricultural conference,

271
00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:05.440
"There is... and finally, delegates,
there is one thing I would like to talk about,

272
00:12:05.440 --> 00:12:08.280
"the scourge of artificial butter flavouring."

273
00:12:08.280 --> 00:12:09.840
"Crusty butterers."

274
00:12:11.200 --> 00:12:13.560
The thing is: it is a scourge.

275
00:12:13.560 --> 00:12:14.480
It is a scourge?

276
00:12:14.480 --> 00:12:17.160
A scourge is actually
a pretty good word for this.

277
00:12:17.160 --> 00:12:20.040
Things that are calling themselves butter when
they aren't really butter,

278
00:12:20.040 --> 00:12:22.360
but they've got pretend butter in them.

279
00:12:22.360 --> 00:12:25.920
Yeah, it's butter flavouring
that goes into other stuff.

280
00:12:25.920 --> 00:12:27.760
"'Tis but-ter flavouring!"

281
00:12:32.760 --> 00:12:36.360
And that’s from the new BBC2 series,
"William Shakespeare, food analyst".

282
00:12:37.640 --> 00:12:41.200
Including a very modern bit of technology.

283
00:12:41.200 --> 00:12:42.440
-VR.
-iPhones!

284
00:12:44.440 --> 00:12:47.920
No, we're looking for something pretty modern,
technology that's…

285
00:12:47.920 --> 00:12:49.360
that's used by a lot of people.

286
00:12:49.360 --> 00:12:51.000
Condoms. Buttery condoms.

287
00:12:51.280 --> 00:12:52.440
Oh, no.

288
00:12:53.160 --> 00:12:54.560
-No.
-Hey, I've seen whiskey flavoured

289
00:12:54.560 --> 00:12:57.760
and smoky bacon flavoured ones in pubs,
so that must be possible.

290
00:12:57.760 --> 00:12:59.640
Those are the crisps, Gary.

291
00:13:01.080 --> 00:13:05.600
The thing you're going to in the bathroom
to get your crisps from, they're not crisps.

292
00:13:05.600 --> 00:13:07.280
Oh, that’s where the kid came from.

293
00:13:09.440 --> 00:13:13.480
This is something that is causing
lung problems.

294
00:13:13.480 --> 00:13:14.800
-Fags.
-Oh, vape!

295
00:13:14.800 --> 00:13:15.840
-Yes.
-Buttery vape?

296
00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:18.560
Buttery vape, popcorn flavoured vape

297
00:13:18.560 --> 00:13:21.840
or butter and popcorn flavoured vape
was a thing for a while.

298
00:13:22.160 --> 00:13:25.360
And now they are trying to sell it
without these chemicals in.

299
00:13:25.360 --> 00:13:29.680
But that... that is vaporising some liquid,
so can you just put butter in it?

300
00:13:29.680 --> 00:13:30.920
Use aerosol butter, yeah.

301
00:13:30.920 --> 00:13:33.240
Or spreadable, that's more liquefied,
isn't it?

302
00:13:33.240 --> 00:13:35.520
Yes, yeah, yeah, more oils though,
you've got to be careful.

303
00:13:35.520 --> 00:13:38.880
I don't think inhaling actual butter is a...

304
00:13:39.240 --> 00:13:43.680
is any better than inhaling diacetyl fumes.

305
00:13:43.680 --> 00:13:44.960
Ah, but is it tastier?

306
00:13:44.960 --> 00:13:46.680
There's only one way to find out, folks.

307
00:13:47.360 --> 00:13:48.680
Smash cut.

308
00:13:48.680 --> 00:13:51.640
And why didn't that flavouring, that margarine,
everything like that,

309
00:13:51.640 --> 00:13:54.520
why didn't that solve the
Norwegian butter crisis?

310
00:13:54.520 --> 00:13:56.200
Because it's dreadful.

311
00:13:56.200 --> 00:13:59.040
Yes, that is actually the case.

312
00:13:59.040 --> 00:14:02.160
Well, margarine, if you've ever seen it
in its natural form, is really unappetising,

313
00:14:02.160 --> 00:14:03.720
just a grey lump, isn't it?

314
00:14:03.720 --> 00:14:07.960
It is coloured yellow so it looks
more like butter, and therefore appetising.

315
00:14:07.960 --> 00:14:12.520
Yeah, you're absolutely right, margarine was
such a poor substitute by Norwegian standards,

316
00:14:12.520 --> 00:14:14.640
that they went out
and bought the butter instead.

317
00:14:14.640 --> 00:14:16.680
I have lower standards than Norway.

318
00:14:16.680 --> 00:14:17.600
And what year was this?

319
00:14:17.600 --> 00:14:19.160
2011.

320
00:14:19.160 --> 00:14:23.520
Oh, so that was still when you could get
reasonable butter substitute?

321
00:14:23.520 --> 00:14:25.000
Yeah, because...

322
00:14:25.000 --> 00:14:26.840
It's still... it is still definitely a substitute?

323
00:14:26.840 --> 00:14:31.020
It is still definitely a substitute
and that was why there was smør-panik,

324
00:14:31.020 --> 00:14:32.800
butter panic in Norway.

325
00:14:32.800 --> 00:14:35.200
And that's what the Smiths song,
'Panic' is about.

326
00:14:35.200 --> 00:14:36.800
Panic in the streets of Oslo?

327
00:14:40.040 --> 00:14:42.360
Yeah, but Morrissey will be enjoying that
because he's a vegan,

328
00:14:42.360 --> 00:14:44.180
he's known as a vegan, isn't he?

329
00:14:44.180 --> 00:14:46.840
I think what we’re learning here is that
Morrissey caused the butter crisis.

330
00:14:47.080 --> 00:14:48.400
"Morrissey!"

331
00:14:49.160 --> 00:14:51.240
Matt, congratulations, Matt, you win the show.

332
00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:58.640
You win a chocolate bar shaped like a cartoon frog

333
00:14:58.640 --> 00:15:01.080
that is also the lead singer
of a Queen tribute act.

334
00:15:01.080 --> 00:15:02.440
F*** off, I've got this.

335
00:15:04.080 --> 00:15:05.100
Gary?

336
00:15:05.100 --> 00:15:06.280
Freddo Mercury.

337
00:15:07.880 --> 00:15:10.080
And with that we say thank you to Chris Joel,

338
00:15:11.080 --> 00:15:12.400
to Gary Brannan,

339
00:15:12.760 --> 00:15:13.960
to Matt Gray.

340
00:15:14.480 --> 00:15:16.760
I've been Tom Scott, we'll see you next time.